You may come up. It’s OK. (Hallo, Master.) (Hallo, Master.) Good food? (Good.) Have you had your meal? (Yes.) Is it OK? Is the food OK? (OK. The food was OK.) Fine, fine. I’m wearing this for you to see my clothes. (New clothes.) (Beautiful.) Is it on? (Yes.) I walk around just to let you look at my new clothes. (Beautiful.) (Good-looking. Good-looking.) My objective is very pure. Each time there is only one objective. Not so complicated. This way you can see more clearly. Why have you lost weight? Karma is cleansed. Is it delicious? (Delicious.) Eat more for me. It’s cold here. It is alright to eat a bit more. (Yes.) Because the meditation time begins at six o’clock. Yes or no? (Yes.) Six or seven o’clock? (Six o’clock.) Six o’clock. Then it’s alright to eat more. Two more hours, enough for digestion. Yes. Very cold. Later, it’ll be very cold, and you’ll feel very hungry.
We have so much space, yet you say it’s not enough. Strange, how come four thousand people look so many? How is it possible? They even told me it’s less than four thousand people. Why are there people everywhere? Previously, when we still had the main meditation hall, remember? (We remember.) It was very small, but three or four thousand people could squeeze in. Now that there’s no main hall, why are there people everywhere? And you tell me that there’re only four thousand people. I don’t believe you; I don’t. Did anyone sneak in? Anyone enter illegally? (No.) If you did, go register quickly, (OK.) or you’ll be in big trouble if I catch you.
Keep your eyes closed during meditation; don’t open them. Understand? (Understand.) Don’t open them even if you have to die. (Yes.) Because you’ll “die” if you open them. Do you understand? (Understand.) You come here just for three days and still wandering around. Don’t look even if I walk by. (OK.) But now you can look. Those who don’t look now, your ID card will be confiscated. Do the right thing at the right time. Understand? (Yes. Understand.) Look clearly when you can look. When it’s time to look inside, look inside. Only with focus can you see results. Otherwise, you’re just sitting there getting a sore butt. And then you go home with nothing. It’s a waste of your time, (Yes.) and my space. It is very crowded in here. In future, we’ll sell tickets. Because there’re too many people, we’ll sell tickets. How much for a seat? How much should it be? This… (Three thousand.) Huh? (Three thousand [NTD].) Only three thousand? It’s too cheap. (Three thousand per day. Per day.) Three thousand a day? (Three thousand a day.) That’s still fine. Barely acceptable. If you don’t meditate well, I’ll sell tickets in the future.
I tell you. If you’re not serious, I’ll sell tickets in the future. Because you don’t cherish it. If it’s too cheap, you don’t cherish it. I’ll definitely sell tickets in the future, so that only those who cherish it will come. And maybe it’ll not be three thousand. Maybe thirty thousand. Thirty thousand is barely acceptable. Because we’re good friends. I charge good friends higher. Be serious. (OK.) I’m most adorable, but if I see people who’re not serious, then I’ll change… My “tiger fist” will come out. Brother (…) was so scared. He’s nothing. See, he sits at the back and squats down. Do you see that? He’s specialized in training police officers. He’s a coach. Look, he’s squatting at the back and very scared. Who are you? Is your kung fu good enough to go against me? You’re not serious in meditation. (Hallo, Master.) Alright. I need to reverse my car. I need to borrow a little space. OK? (OK.) (Hallo, Master.) Alright. Time to eat. See you later.
There are more women than men in Taiwan (Formosa). Boys are valuable in Taiwan (Formosa). (No. Being alone is better.) Don’t be afraid. Have you… Is there any wife that the husband doesn’t want? Here, there’s a husband his wife doesn’t want. He’s standing there. Take a look. He’s so cute and benevolent. He used to give his wife twenty thousand a month. Amazing. Consider it quickly. OK. Thank you. (Go eat.) Time for eating. (Yes.) OK. Go eat. (Hallo, Master.) (Beautiful.) Why don’t you bring your kids here? Is the younger one still in Hong Kong? (Yes.) You abandon your children and wife like that. (It’s very tiring to bring children.) Why is she always taking care of the children and let you come? (Yes, yes. She did come for the 3-day retreat last time.) No. Did she really? (Yes.) Last time you took care of the children and then she came, is that right? (There’s one time.) Only one time. During the Lunar New Year, was it? But that child really doesn’t need you. He’s smarter than you. (Yes.) That child is very old. His soul is very old. Wow. You all don’t want to eat and just stand on both sides looking at the beauty. (Hallo, Master.) OK, yeah. (Master.) (Hallo, Master.) Today you can see me more clearly. (Yes.) (Hallo, Master.) (Hallo, Master.) I’m going. I’m going, I’m going, going, going home. See you later, OK? (Yes.) (Hallo, Master.) (Hallo, Master.) See you later. (See You.) Brother, thank you. Thank you all. (Thank You, Master.)
All the white foreigners can come up to the stage. If you have any questions, you can ask me. The white foreigners come up first. Come sit around. Sorry, you should be seated here in the first place. They make a mess. They make the arrangement for Sunday, not for retreats. On Sundays, all the males sometimes sit here. But not on retreat. On retreat, the foreigners are priority. Come here. What’s your name again? I never remember. That’s all we have today? Oh, my God! Do you have any questions? I don’t think so. You don’t have enough number. What’s your number? Nothing, right? (I don’t know.) OK, you don’t know. Alright. From Brazil? (Belgium.) No, Belgium, Belgium, the professor. From the universal university. Right? Your wife’s here? (Yes, she is.) Why didn’t she come up? (Because she’s not…) She’s black, right? (She’s white.) Come up, come up, come. Never mind.
All the American and European disciples come up here. Doesn’t matter what color, just come up. Because you understand English, if you don’t, then you stick your ears there and stay there. American and European, from America and from Europe, can come up. And be quick before I change my mind. I can be very quick. Professor, you’re progressing very well, huh? (Yes.) At least your face. From the vegan diet, you look like a cabbage now. Very good example. I remember you were not so “prosperous” a few years ago. You didn’t look so prosperous. Right? Now, you progressed well. (No, I weigh fewer kilos than before.) Oh, really? I don’t think so. You look so good, very pink. Oh, and this man is supposed to be black. Now he comes?
Any questions? Tomorrow morning, you can sit here, In the morning. And bring your cushions and your sleeping bag with you. Poor kids, come from such a long way. Guards, go and find… Which guard? Go and find some vegan cookies and candies and give them to me. (OK.) Who’s the one running so fast? He wants to steal your job. Don’t go. If someone else is going, you don’t need to go. Do you have any questions? No? Oh, good. Those are the Stammgäste (regular customers). Frequent visitors don’t have any questions. Only those lousy, who don’t meditate, don’t come for retreat, they have a lot of questions. The questions are written on their face, written on their nose, written on their ears, and eyes, everywhere.
You’re new, right, brother? (Yes.) You’re alright? (Excuse me?) You are OK? (Yes, I’m great. Thank You.) Did you get the experience that you expected? (Excuse me?) You have a problem with hearing, I guess. (No, no, my English is...) Oh, what do you speak? (I’m from Peru.) Peru? Oh, I see. Wow, it’s a long way. (Yes.) Welcome, brother, welcome. (Thank You.) I guess you speak Spanish, no? (Yes.) OK, and I don’t. That’s very beautiful. Do we have translator for Spanish? Somebody speaks Spanish here? Come up quickly. Come up quickly, some Spanish people. No? OK. Good news, nobody speaks Spanish here. That saves us a lot of problems. I think I have one or two here, but they didn’t come this time. (I know English.) You know English better than I? OK. Do you have any questions? No. (No.) You have good experience? (Not yet.) Not yet? Then wait until you meditate well and have good experience, then we can communicate inside.
Push over. For the moment, I’ll give you some green (vegan) jelly, for green card. Green. “Green” means “go-ahead,” come. Did not Tong take care of you? (Excuse me?) Tong did not take care of you? (Yes, very nice man.) He did. Nice guy, huh? (Yes.) Oh, I think Peru is a very nice country. How come? And it’s peaceful now? (Ah, yes, very peaceful.) Good for you. (You should go there, it’s very nice.) Huh? (You should come someday, it’s very nice.) OK. That’s… I expect you would say that. (Yes.) Here. (Thank You.) Pick up and eat slowly. I don’t come to Peru at least for a long time. I don’t know yet. So, pick up. Peru’s a nice country. Give to the people in your hometown. (Thank You.) Peru [is] new, but a lot of people like to practice meditation, first time. (Yes, there are a lot of people.) Many, many, all the time. (Yes.) It’s the first time that a country, new, brand-new country, and many people registered for initiation, but they have to eat cabbage for three more months first. Cabbage. I know, I know; you know English better, but I’m just joking. This is the “land of joking.” The center of laughing, so you will hear that a lot.
Photo Caption: “Spring Reminds All to Turn Toward the LIGHT”
